Scarlet (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} scarletdemon) wrote,@ 2008-05-12 16:00:00 |
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Naked Truth
A long time ago, somebody told me something about LJ and I refused to believe it, or at least I refused to believe the SCALE of what was happening. More recently I have scratched the surface of LJ a little deeper and it seems that they were RIGHT and I was wrong (there's a first).
It seems that if you are a male LJer and you have anything like a decent sized Friends List, you can totally expect to get unsolicited NAKED or TOPLESS photos emailed to you, by random women you've encountered here. Unasked-for, unwanted and probably unattractive pictures (given that these women have to AMBUSH men into looking at them). Ugh. If men show women on LJ a little attention, maybe sympathise or flirt a bit (in other words act like humans)...Some women think it appropriate to "reward" them with unexpected wham-bam-thank-you-spam of the undressed kind. Apparently, when it comes to the women who sexually harass men on LJ "The quiet ones are the worst" (Anon).
"Oh POOR men!" I hear you snigger and at first it does seem funny doesn't it? Just like we might grin at hearing how a small woman beats her large husband, or how a man is being sexually harassed by a woman at work...But surely men should have the same right to protection that women have? Men on LJ don't commonly send naked pictures to women do they?
Men have a perfect right to opt IN to getting pictures, if they are offered, but they shouldn't have to put up with crazy bitches sending photos willy-nilly. How dare a woman assume that a man who may well be married, in a long term relationship, shy, not interested in her sexually etc. wants naked pictures of her appearing in his Inbox. Asandrewhickey told me in the pub,
"One of the pitfalls of being a man online is that women send you naked photos".
At least three men on LJ have emailed me over the years, asking me not to flirt with them in their journals, because it upset their girlfriends...Imagine the shit they'd get into if said girlfriends saw them open a topless photo of a woman they'd encountered on LJ! And men have told me how awkward it makes them feel when a woman they'd previously considered a nice friend suddenly makes a weird sexual advance, completely inappropriate to the mood of their relationship thus far (Edit: Not in relation to me flirting I should add!).
Of course, some men don't mind (for scientific reasons). http://unimag.livejournal.com/88769.htm
And some women are open to candid shots. http://scarletdemon.livejournal.com/269
And lots of girls have "sex-filters" or journals where they pose naked FOR MEN WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO LOOK. That's fine. I'm not going all Victorian...I just think some women need to CALM THE FUCK DOWN and stop sending home-made porn, just because some bloke actually pays them a tiny bit of attention.
If you are a man on LJ, what do you think of this? Have you encountered it?
If you are a woman...Do YOU send men unsolicited pictures? Does your partner (if he is on LJ) get harrassed (ask him, don't assume he doesn't)?
Have I only been talking to incredibly irresistible men, or something?
(With thanks tocindy_reddeer who paid for my account and is a very sweet friend and not a sex maniac).
A long time ago, somebody told me something about LJ and I refused to believe it, or at least I refused to believe the SCALE of what was happening. More recently I have scratched the surface of LJ a little deeper and it seems that they were RIGHT and I was wrong (there's a first).
It seems that if you are a male LJer and you have anything like a decent sized Friends List, you can totally expect to get unsolicited NAKED or TOPLESS photos emailed to you, by random women you've encountered here. Unasked-for, unwanted and probably unattractive pictures (given that these women have to AMBUSH men into looking at them). Ugh. If men show women on LJ a little attention, maybe sympathise or flirt a bit (in other words act like humans)...Some women think it appropriate to "reward" them with unexpected wham-bam-thank-you-spam of the undressed kind. Apparently, when it comes to the women who sexually harass men on LJ "The quiet ones are the worst" (Anon).
"Oh POOR men!" I hear you snigger and at first it does seem funny doesn't it? Just like we might grin at hearing how a small woman beats her large husband, or how a man is being sexually harassed by a woman at work...But surely men should have the same right to protection that women have? Men on LJ don't commonly send naked pictures to women do they?
Men have a perfect right to opt IN to getting pictures, if they are offered, but they shouldn't have to put up with crazy bitches sending photos willy-nilly. How dare a woman assume that a man who may well be married, in a long term relationship, shy, not interested in her sexually etc. wants naked pictures of her appearing in his Inbox. As
andrewhickey told me in the pub, "One of the pitfalls of being a man online is that women send you naked photos".
At least three men on LJ have emailed me over the years, asking me not to flirt with them in their journals, because it upset their girlfriends...Imagine the shit they'd get into if said girlfriends saw them open a topless photo of a woman they'd encountered on LJ! And men have told me how awkward it makes them feel when a woman they'd previously considered a nice friend suddenly makes a weird sexual advance, completely inappropriate to the mood of their relationship thus far (Edit: Not in relation to me flirting I should add!).
Of course, some men don't mind (for scientific reasons). http://unimag.livejournal.com/88769.htm
And some women are open to candid shots. http://scarletdemon.livejournal.com/269
And lots of girls have "sex-filters" or journals where they pose naked FOR MEN WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO LOOK. That's fine. I'm not going all Victorian...I just think some women need to CALM THE FUCK DOWN and stop sending home-made porn, just because some bloke actually pays them a tiny bit of attention.
If you are a man on LJ, what do you think of this? Have you encountered it?
If you are a woman...Do YOU send men unsolicited pictures? Does your partner (if he is on LJ) get harrassed (ask him, don't assume he doesn't)?
Have I only been talking to incredibly irresistible men, or something?
(With thanks to
cindy_reddeer who paid for my account and is a very sweet friend and not a sex maniac).
