Scarlet (scarletdemon) wrote,

The Wages Of Sin

A long time ago, my oldest son recommended "The Satanic Bible" to me. He said it was a really good (probably not the right word in this context) book. At first I thought, "OMFG what did I do to deserve this spawnofsatan goth emo kid?!11!!" but after he had talked to me about it for a while, I said I'd read it. Then I promptly forgot all about it, because I'm like that.

Anyway, for some reason that I've already forgotten (because I'm like that) I was looking at "The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth" online yesterday. I found them interesting and amusing:

The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth

by Anton Szandor LaVey ©1967

1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

3. When in another’s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.

7. Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.

8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

9. Do not harm little children.

10. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

Check out numbers 2 & 8! That's Satan trying to destroy LiveJournal, right there!

Anyway, I've decided that tomorrow I will take some of my hard-earned cash and buy The Satanic Bible. It isn't a huge book, I'm sure it's fascinating and it will give me something to ponder whilst I sit in the Cafe with my colleague, who has probably never heard of Satan (James Blunt hasn't written a song about Satan has he?) so she won't be afraid. If I don't post by this time next week, you'll know I've been struck by lightning, or had my eyes pecked out by ravens, or something.
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